counterproductive

I walked by the Starbucks on South U today, only to see a sign that said "Wi-Fi Unavailable." Nothing out of the ordinary, except someone had crossed out with black Sharpie "Wi-Fi" and had written "Water" instead. The sign read "Water Unavailable." Below it, also in Sharpie, was written: "We cannot make any bevrages at this time." (And yes, they spelled beverages wrong.)

I wanted to let the workers know about this atrocious prank (and I also wanted a caramel Frappuccino), so I walked in and told the guy at the counter. He looked at me completely seriously and said, "I know."

"You know that there's a sign on your door that says you're not serving beverages."

"Yes. I know."

"This is Starbucks. All you guys do is make drinks."

"I know."

"So why aren't you serving drinks. What does this mean, you don't have water?"

"We don't have water. The water main broke, so we can't wash our hands. So by health code regulations, we can't serve any drinks."

"So... why are you open?"

"We're selling bottled products and pastries."

This Starbucks sucks.
"Okay. I think I'm going to get a bottled mocha Frappuccino."

I picked up a luke-warm bottle.

"Oh, I think there are colder ones."

I touch all four bottles lined up. They're all the same temperature. Guy comes around counter and touches them too. He grabs one, says, "This one's the coldest."

Whatever. They're exactly the same temperature. But whatever you say.
"Okay. Thanks. I'll take that one."

What's the point of having a coffeeshop that doesn't serve coffee? It's just counterproductive, like the millions of other things that don't make sense in the world. People especially don't make sense.